I'm so fucking centered right now
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
