I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
