erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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