Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
