dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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