I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
