these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
We need a shit load of segways right now
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
