then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
