We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I look better un-naked...
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
