I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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