Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Randomize
