At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Randomize
