you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize