Already got asked if we're dating
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
