Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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