wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize