She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
