I just threw up on my dentist
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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