i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
you had me at cake vodka
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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