This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
