you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
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