Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
