I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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