Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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