Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
My dad is sitting where you rode me
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
