I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
