Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
