That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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