the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
