either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize