that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
