but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
