He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
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