dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Randomize
