Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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