hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize