Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
