I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
