So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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