HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
