I am puke
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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