yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
is that a dick in a sweater?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
