I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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