if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize