I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
