Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
