Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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