I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Randomize
