I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Even my vagina gasped.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
