Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
